Idol Recap :: "And Regrets, They'll Sing A Few"

Ryan says last week was a "wake up" call to vote for your favorite, as Siobhan shrieked her last on Wednesday. Do we even have favorites this season?

In its constant effort to get the contestants to be "relevant" and "contemporary", American Idol brings us "Songs of Frank Sinatra." Because there's nothing like 50 year old music to bring out that modern edge. The guest mentor is Harry Connick Jr. His big advice to the Remedial Idols is to "sing the words and the melodies." Yes, advice like that will carry them far. Perhaps even toward the soundtrack for "Hope Floats II: Electric Boogaloo".

Aaron Kelly” “Fly Me to the Moon”
Aaron busts out his "big boy" Sears Best vest to summon some Rat Pack swagger. Swagger says, "no." It's fine vocally, but a little karaoke. Randy and Ellen liked it, but are we even listening to them anymore? Kara was lukewarm, and Simon co-signs that by citing the performance as lacking conviction and mentions "the vocals on the end were a bit corny."

Casey James: “Blue Skies”
Casey's in the pimp chair. Last week, a non-tv watching friend called him, offering him a $50 gig at the Circle Inn tonight. Casey laughed it off, saying he was "busy, playing on national tv". Oh, Casey. Just wait two more weeks. I think your schedule may clear up.

Casey's "Blue Skies" is a bit of a stormy affair. The pitch is off, and notes drop like fleas off Bowersox hair. It's like a musical episode of the old Dungeons and Dragons cartoon, starring Uni, the bleating unicorn. It's a performance that has "Vote for the Worst" backing Casey, and renaming themselves "Goat for the Worst." So, yeah, it's like that. The Judges hate on it, as Simon found it a "bit awkward." This week, I think "bit" is British for "a lot."

Crystal Bowersox: “Summer Wind”
Crystal said she's using a different singing voice tonight. Her "not as good" one. For the first time, her performance is lacking oooomph. It's OK vocally, but it's devoid of any originality or energy. Look up "meh" in the e-dictionary and you will see Crystal singing "Summer Wind." The Judges thought it was "subdued" and Simon "expects better."

Mike Lynche: “The Way You Look Tonight”
So Big Mike is singing another song about his fine lady. Subtext: Also, his new baby. The man has a new baby. So vote, bitches. Have you seen his new baby?

Big Mike wears a hipster hat that irks me in its self-aware jauntiness. Vocally fine, but utterly boring. And arm stretching and hat tipping? Gross. The Judges all like it. Looks like Big Mike will be safe another week. In related news, Velveeta stock is up.

Lee DeWyze: “That’s Life”
Like everyone else tonight, Lee finds Harry Connick Jr. hilarious. I think these people need to define "hilarious." Or perhaps redefine it. Lee's performance is the best of the night for me, as he infuses "That's Life" with his own vocal signature. It at least sounds contemporary, and it's the only performance tonight that held my attention. The Judges love it and Simon even says "it was by far the best performance of the night."

So who's going? I think Casey will be flying the friendly blue skies back home.